entry

The room is colored and hazy. I'm hanging, my wrist tied to a chain of some sort above me. soul is fucking me. My vision is coming into nidus. I see a pitch blackness man grinning at me. My legs are wrapped around his waist ; he's holding me up by my ass and is making me cum.

I don't remember anything from the terminal hour. I have no idea how I got here. All I know is my pussy is numb, dripping with juices.

The climax washes over me and the inkiness man leaves. Another takes his place. He grabs my legs, pulls them around his waist and has his turn. I don't understand what's going on, but I know I don't want it to end.

It doesn't. It goes on for 60 minutes. I don't know what time it is ; if it's morn or night. lightlessness man after black man take me as I hang here. Every one of them brings me to muscular orgasm. My body feels like jelly.

Then I see someone I recognize. I know his name. The memories temporarily become clearer. I remember flashing, coloration lights, forte medicine, people, crapulence and him - Fat Rob.

He stands in straw man of me, twist me up like the others did and slides his fat putz in me. I cry out, moaning, looking to the ceiling. All I see is a single bright spark above me. His cock flavor so honest, so thick and big.

"Your husband is going to have a go at it we stretched out that slit of yours, Miss Brandi,"Fat Rob tells me, pumping his hips upward.

"What ?"I ask. I look to my exit hand above me, I see my wedding doughnut. I could've sworn Leanna, my daughter told me to take it off. more memories return.

She did tell me to bump off it. She said I needed this night, she said I deserve it.

Another orgasm courses through me. Fat Rob doesn't stop. He keeps going, keeps bouncing me. I love this feeling, feeling helpless, hanging there, my wrists tied. I can get a line the chain rattling as I go up and down on Fat Rob's cock.

"I bet he can't please you like this,"Fat Rob says, still taking me.

I shake my top dog. Did Leanna know this would occur ? Did she know I'd be here with this man ?

More memories return. I see my daughter, tall, red hair smiling at me, leading me somewhere. To a building. I see her smiling side after she whispers in my ear to slack and have fun. We were at a club, that's what led me here - a dolt dark club.

Images of her laughing, talking, dancing with men, pointing in my direction, waving me over. My husband, Doug, I see his face future. Was Leanna trying to get me to wander on Doug tonight ?

Fat Rob smacking my ass, grits his teeth, and cums inside me. It feels so good. His huge load of warm semen fill me up. He steps away smiles, laughing,"That's a full pussy, Miss Brandi. How old did you say you were ?"

I can't remember. I can't even remember my age."F-forty,"I struggle to talk."Something."

Fat Rob nods and unchains me. My blazon don't hurt, neither do my radiocarpal joint. My body is mush in his blazonry. He carries me to a bed. I don't see Leanna anywhere.

Fat Rob kisses my left hand,"That's a nice diamond your hubby got you. How farsighted you two been married ?"

I can't reply, I can barely talk."Six years,"I'm able to get out, answering his question about my marriage to Leanna's stepfather, Doug.

"Mmmm,"he guides my handwriting to his weakened cock. I instinctively grab it, squeeze it, my wedding ring seems to glint brightly against his saturnine brown shaft.

The next matter I know, the elbow room dims, darker and darker before going pitching fatal. My jumbled retentivity return as I try to piece this night together.


-1-
A mates month ago, November, I was waiting for soul. I was sitting in my government agency waiting for him to arrive. I'm a counsel, some may forebode me a shrink, but I'm not a head-shrinker. I can't prescribe medicine ; I don't have a doctorate. healer is an acceptable condition for my profession I suppose.

He was a new patient role. He was running late that day.

I remember fiddling with my wedding ring, thought process of Doug, thinking of his smile. Doug, Leanna and I moved to Atlanta a yr prior to be close to Doug's kin. Truthfully, I hated the movement, but agreed to it. Work is certainly more active, compared to Charleston. I rarely have any downtime like I did there.

I sighed and thought about cancelling, but I figured I'd give this guy a few More second to arrive.

I stood, straightened out my business case, and looked out the window. I watched the rain fall, covering the parking lot, the cars in the distance were locked in their usual stop-go traffic.

There was a knock at the threshold, without thinking I said"come in"still watching the rain. I remember Doug and I had sex outside last class in the rain once. It was summertime fourth dimension though.

"hullo ?"the vocalism spoke up behind me, shaking me from my trance.

I turned around and saw him. My mouthpiece nearly dropped open. I was looking at the most attractive man I had ever seen.

"Um, hi, hello, make out in,"I stammered. I cleared my pharynx, approached him, extending my hand. I introduced myself as Brandi.
He shook it softly, smiling back at me. With my senior high bounder on, I was his height, around 5'10"or so.

"Hi, I'm Ulysses. Nice to touch you,"he nodded, looking around the part for a chair.

I watched him, Doug temporarily leaving my thoughts. Ulysses was very muscular, wearing a fuddled t-shirt, and shipment pants. The pelting had an essence on his skin - his dark-chocolate skin, making it glisten. He wiped his os frontale of rain.

"Oh, um, sorry, yes, feel innocent to sit there or the redact. Whatever is well-fixed,"I spoke up.

With my pen and theme, I took a seat across from him. He chose the chair.

He was nervous, most first timers are. I was uneasy too, but not about meeting a new patient. He was having that essence on me.

"So, Ulysses, what can I do for you ?"

"Well, um, not sure where to begin. I guess I'm just having topic when it comes to a certain aspect of my animation,"Ulysses answered.

"Ok, well I'll do my best to leave guidance."

"Yeah, well, it's,"he paused. I could see the nerves.

"You can tell me. Are you having tension or anxiety offspring ? Problems coping with work, problem adjusting to change in life ?"I asked, staring into his eyes, avoiding his biceps and chests.

"It's sex,"he blurted out, quickly feeling embarrassed.

"Oh, I see,"my judgement initially thought of performance number. I've counseled a few phratry that had anxieties and other issues that affected their sex life negatively.

"No, not performance problem. I just um,"he say my idea and paused again.

Thinking about past patient role, I pressed him further."Sexual preference issues ? Maybe another case of dysfunction ?"

Ulysses shook his oral sex."No,"he took a deep breath."Sex is my life. Everything about lifespan revolves around it. I can't get away from it and everything ends up in sex."

I hoped I wasn't blushing. My heart darted quickly to his muscular human body, then to his dread pulled back into a ponytail, finally, embarrassingly, I glanced to his crotch.

"I see,"I collected my idea, jotting this John L. H. Down on my notepad."So you feel you may possess some sort of addiction to sex ?"

"No. I don't. That's the matter. I'm not addicted. The thought of going workweek or month without it, yeah I guess it'd suck, but I'd be ticket. I wouldn't have withdrawals."

"Ok, so no addiction. Can you explain what you mean by sex being your lifespan ?"

"Yeah,"Ulysses glanced behind me to the rain outside."No matter what I do, who I meet, where I go, sex is always involved. Sometimes it's strangers, sometimes not, but it never fails. I go out of town for work, girl at the hotel front man desk. I fly out of the state for study, the flight of stairs attendant on the planer. I want to go catch a movie alone late one nighttime, the college student that works there. I even offered to help do curtilage work for an older woman I know, and well, like everything else, it ended up with sex."

"So they initiate ?"

"Yes, always."

"Why is this bothering you ?"

"Because, sometimes I feel like that's all I do or am. There's more to life. I tried finding it. I'd go on holiday alone, I'd always play a woman."

"wealthy person you thought about simply saying no or choosing not to allow the sex to materialise ?"I asked.

"Yeah, I've thought of that. But these women, were so beautiful,"Ulysses answered. Then he said something that made me breathe in sharply, hoping he didn't hear me.

"All these beautiful woman, blanched cleaning lady, I just,"Ulysses sighed, shaking his head.

"White women ?"I asked, my bosom pace increasing.

"Yes. A few Latina as well, but near all have been white. I don't know if it's because I'm Black person or what. But I want to say no, I want to not feel like a while of meat, but there's just something so beautiful about them,"Ulysses said, heart to the floor.

I didn't know where to go from here. I went the standard, typical path. I started with his childhood.


-2-

This way is burning hot now. I'm on all quatern, I'm being whipped by Fat Rob. The rampart look like they're on fervency. Am I in snake pit ? Is this demon, Fat Rob, going to devote me what I need ?

He tosses this whip aside and penetrates me again, slamming his rose hip into my ass. I glance to my wedding ring.

"Doug,"I whisper, ineffective to rationalize before another orgasm comes over me.

Fat Rob seize my dirty-blonde lock, pulling my head back as he fills me yet again with his seed.

He slams me down on the bed, the igneous force of the walls subsides, I black out again, thinking of the commencement day I met Ulysses.

*

"My forefather remarried when I was 12 or so. Her name is Devin. She was a young, white woman, blonde,"Ulysses smiled.

"You used deliver tense when you told me her name."

"Yes, we're still a part of each other's life story. Even since their divorce a few years ago."

I made a note and nodded for him to continue.

"She was, is, marvelous. She helped get up me. But because she's only 9 or 10 geezerhood older than me, we hung out a lot. We'd go to movies ; she'd fill me to sporting events while my dad worked. She was a enceinte friend. Then I got older."

"That's when affair became more intimate ?"

"Yes. It was consensual. There was no assault, she didn't sexually abuse me. But she gave herself to me. She taught me everything about sex. I was Thomas Young and gooselike, maybe I had a jam on her, maybe I loved her - I don't know. But it was incredible. Our secret affair."

Ulysses chuckled thinking of a memory.

"What ?"I asked.

"For my high school graduation present, she threw me a surprisal party. My dad wasn't around - he worked a lot anyway. At the party, I was the alone guy from my school there. I have no musical theme how she arranged it, how Devin pulled it off, but she invited every single girl in my high schooltime graduating class to this company. Cheerleaders, volleyball game, basketball thespian, even some fille that were considered ‘ nerd'or ‘ oddball ’."

"Ok,"I knew where this was headed."What about this party made you laugh softly ?"

Ulysses'nerve went serious."About 100 girlfriend showed up. 50 or so didn't. As I said, Devin invited all of them. Of the 1 that showed up, they were livid. There was a descent out of our house, going to the sidewalk and down the street. All these girl,"Ulysses paused.

"It's ok,"I smiled gently at him."You can evidence me. I'm here to realize and help."

"They all, um, rode me until they climaxed. The start girl would go, she'd get off me, then side by side and so on until all 100 little girl orgasmed."

I nodded my head, the visual sinking in, the mental imagery of 100 18-year-old Stanford White young woman in a line riding this man's black cock - I shook my head, I didn't want these view there.

"I see, so that was her present to you. Sex."

"Yes. Afterward, they all left, hugging me bye, saying good luck at college, and so on, Devin and I remained. We made love in my room. I didn't finish with those daughter, but I did finish in her."

I took musical note and paused,"Do you love Devin ?"

"Yes, very much."

"Yet you have sex with other women ?"

"Her and I aren't technically a couple. I sorta view her as a mother figure. She's like the mom I never had and erotic love me in every way. I guess our relationship is open, unconditional."

curio was getting the outdo of me,"So you have sex with early women, about are white. Is this a casual case ?"

"Yes. If it's not Devin, it's three or four early habitue I suppose."

persuasion of several white woman leaving and arriving to his nursing home to take sex with him daily flashed in my head. I looked at his arms, thigh - wow. I had to focus, I needed to be master. I glanced to my notepad and wedding ring.

"Have you considered making affair scoop with Devin ? Perhaps even marrying her ? I take it your Father isn't around or knows about you and his ex, your one-time step-mother ?"

"No, he lives in LA and doesn't know her and I are like this. And no, it wasn't the cause of their divorce. He was caught several clock time cheating, and since Devin and I were a thing, she went ahead and divorced him."

I checked the time, it was nearing the end of his starting time session. We chatted a little more about Devin, how often she means to him, how much they care for one another.

"Ulysses, I want you to really register her how lots you love her. It sounds like it's a lot. I know you have an give relationship with her, but maybe go somewhere or do something that's just you and her. Doesn't have to be sex, could be dinner, movies, hiking, something that isn't sexual. Maybe even suggest you and her go undivided. From talking with you about her, it sounds like she loves you like a son and a lover. That's up to you though. Mainly, drop extra prison term with her and her only, not having sex. Try it,"I smiled at him.

He smiled back and stood. We shook manpower and I told him I'd see him next week.

I watched him from my window, raceway across the parking lot to his car. I couldn't assistant but guess how handsome and dainty he was. No wonder white woman like him. I felt shame for thinking that, clutching my left over hand, running my finger over my marriage ring.

*

I hear my girl somewhere. She's crying out in joy. One of Fat Rob's champion must be fucking her. I'm in Fat Rob's blazonry, kissing him as he bounces me on his cock. I never want to exit this place.

He's taking me somewhere, down a hall. We enter a room. I see my girl on a bed, riding a black man, her hired man in her long red head of hair, grinding her hips against him. He has a smug look on his face watching her drive him.

Fat Rob lays me down next to Leanna and climbs on top of me.

"Hey Mom,"Leanna says nonchalantly. She runs her hands through her hairsbreadth."I love smutty dick. I'm so glad we went out tonight."

I try to answer, but can't. The monolithic Fat Rob is on top of me, making me cum so good once more.

After seeing and hearing Leanna cum again, the men take a breakage, leaving us alone. She rolls over, smiling at me. Did she bring me here ? I still can't figure this out. The way goes dark again.


-3-

Thinking back to Ulysses'endorsement appointment, I decided to ask about his work-life.

"Sex there too,"he bluntly admitted."No I'm not a male person prostitute."

I laughed,"I didn't think you were."

"I've done yoga instruction, personal trainer work, but mostly some, well, physical fitness mould,"he bashfully admitted.

"That's why you travel ?"

"Right. Different locations for several photoshoots. Been to European Economic Community, brazil nut, all over."

"So you have sex with the great unwashed you meet there ? Locals ?"I asked.

"Sometimes. It's mostly coworkers though. Usually after pic shoots with me, we'll meet up for drunkenness and end up in my bed."

"Has this caused publication for your work ?"

"Not yet. None of the woman have tried to get me fired for sleeping with another poser, or tried to manipulate their way into shooting with me. It's all been drama free. But still,"Ulysses shook his head.

"What ?"

"It's employment, it's a job. Sex shouldn't be involved. I mean, I feel unprofessional."

"You don't have to kip with these cleaning woman though. No one is forcing you,"I smiled softly at him.

"I know but, it's so hard,"Ulysses said. My thoughts went to something else that would be hard - his erection. I scolded myself internally and focused on my job.

"Perhaps you could quest a change at work ? Maybe shooting for different type of ads - 1 that don't feature article female person models."

"I tried that. Didn't work. I had a photo shoot with a magazine called Elite powder magazine. I thought it was going to be simple stuff in the gym, doing example, lifting weights and so on. It'd be for their health and fitness section of the powder magazine. Turns out,"Ulysses shook his head.

"Go on,"I urged, slightly looking forward to how sex became involved.

"Turns out the cartridge holder is marketed toward fateful men. It also turns out that,"he shrugged."All the female models are white. And it just so pass white female framework are used in pretty much every article type. Fitness, health, cars, street bikes, entertainment section all have black male manakin and white female models."

"I see, so that's where the sex occurred,"I nodded, imagining him taking a manakin off the set after a photoshoot and pinning her against the wall, having sex.

"Right,"he continued."Both of them,"he added.

"Both ?"

"There were two exemplar. Two blonde, fairly big in the tooshie,"Ulysses said.

"Oh. I understand."

"They had them wearing flyspeck exercise outfits. They posed us in all form of awkward poses to make it look like they were coming on to me at the gym. Jenna and Alexis. They were nice girls, but I knew sex with the two of them would fall out. They purposefully made sure enough to rub themselves against me. It was awkward."

"Did you think about saying no ? Or asking them to gage down ?"I asked, knowing he probably enjoyed it.

"No. The photographer was setting us up in these mannerism. Jenna would be in figurehead of me, Alexis behind me, rubbing my shoulders. One mannerism of the both of them face me, my munition around them resting my hands on their scurvy back. It all led up to it."

"It ?"I knew what he meant, but I wanted him to say it.

"Yeah. After the shoot, they found me in the cascade. Both were naked, both entered, and well, the body of water ran cold we were in there so long. Then afterward we kept going, they used their ‘ endowment'a lot on me."

I giggled, I knew he meant their big butts."I see. Well to aim matter away from sex, perhaps debate -"

"A career change ?"Ulysses joked.

"Yes !"I laughed.

We shared a grinning and prolonged eye contact before I continued the session.

*

The room is so smart now. It has to be daylight. I'm defenseless, dried semen is all over me. I'm somewhere familiar. I rise up in my bed, Doug's and my bed. I'm surrounded by sleeping black men.

"No,"I struggle to leave our sleeping room, using the wall to steady me. I don't hassle putting on clothes.

I hear moans coming from Leanna's way. I barge in and see her being twice teamed by two bootleg men."Hey Mom,"she says in between moans and grunts.

Fat Rob is in my kitchen, eating breakfast he must've Cook for himself.

"You have to leave. Now ! My husband will be home soon. Doug can't see this,"I plead.

"Sure,"Fat Rob grin, finishing his eggs. He whistles loudly, and slowly but surely, he and his crowd make their way out.

I hear Leanna whining and complaining as the two men she's with leave-taking. Some are clothed, some are nude, there must've been 15 men in the sign. I can't believe what I've done.

I start crying, looking at my wedding ring. Leanna doesn't attention, she happily walks about, totally nude.

"What a night !"she laughs."Hopefully Doug won't find out and we can do it again and again and again !"

I can't believe her. I can't believe this has happened. It feels like the walls are closing in on me. I run away, I run to my bedroom.

Strange, the cascade is running. Did I leave it on ? Everything seems so confusing now. I enter the bathroom and pull back the mantle. One of Fat Rob's acquaintance is in there showering and jacking off. I stare at that massive bootleg cock, shake my principal, take a cryptical breath and get in the exhibitor with him.


-4-

I don't experience his name, or why he stayed fanny. Why didn't he leave with Fat Rob, why couldn't he exhibitioner elsewhere ?

He's fucking me hard from behind. I know my married man will be home soon, but I couldn't resist. What's wrong with me ?

Doug can't see this. I have to end this, I have to get this guy out of the house, but I can't. I don't want to. I want him to save fucking me.

"Brandi ? You home ?"I hear Doug call off out to me.

"Here !"I manage to say. The black guy I'm in the exhibitioner with is slamming hard into me. The slapping phone are too loud.

I go to my knees, sucking all over this black cock when Doug enters the privy."How was your trip ?"I ask from behind the exhibitioner drapery. I resume sucking on the black man's hawkshaw as Doug answers.

"It was great. Productive,"I hear him say at the sink. I can't remember where he went, but I'm guessing work related.

"You and Leanna have a nice weekend ?"He asks me. My drumhead is bobbing back and Forth on the cock. The black guy has his hands on my head holding me in place.

"Brandi ?"I hear him say, turning off the sink.

"Mmhmm ! Great !"I manage to get out.

"goodness,"Doug leaves the bathroom. I stand, kiss the black guy, and deform back around in the rain shower. He shoves is cock back inside me and keeps going. I can't assistant but moan.

"You ok ?"Doug reentered the bathroom.

"Uh huh ! Stomach ache,"I answer. The man snap up my pass, kissing my cervix, then compress my pap from behind.

"Sorry truelove. Anyway, I'm going to finish unpacking,"I heard Doug say as he left."Enjoy your shower."

"I will,"I whisper just before another orgasm comes over me.

He picks me up, it's his turn of events to cum. I can look over the top of the shower curtain now, into the sleeping room. The inkiness man is bouncing me up and down on him. I see Doug happily unpacking. He has no melodic theme his wife is in the exhibitioner with a Negro guy getting relentlessly fucked.

Why doesn't Doug hear us ? Why doesn't he arrive in and stop it ? How can he not know ? Where are the black guy's clothes ? Department of Energy Doug see them ?
My eyes roll in the back of my head once more as I feel my pussy filling with seed. I look to the bedroom again, Doug is gone. I need this dark guy gone too, before Doug sees him.

I suck his pecker clean and jerk of excess semen - it tastes so good. I lead him back to the bedroom, I see the double-door to our back porch is open. Did I open it ? Maybe Doug opened it.

I kiss my shower bath buff auf wiedersehen and ascertain him cash in one's chips our nursing home through her bedroom. I climb in bed and wait for my husband to return.

When he does he get me defenseless, leg cattle ranch. He undresses and climbs on top. As he enters me I wonder if he can find a difference. I wonder if I'll ever be the same.

I turn my point to look out the back porch, the double-doors are still undecided. Doug is still on top, kissing my neck opening. I see individual on the porch.

It's Fat Rob, he's smugly grinning at me. He's watching my husband make love to me. Fat Rob takes his cock out, shaking it playfully. How did he get there ? Was he picking up his friend ? I don't know, I watch him, I picture that big black prick inside me instead of my husband's. I start cumming.

"Yes ! Yes !"I cry out to Fat Rob, climaxing at the Lapplander sentence. Fat Rob nods, puts his cock back in his pant and leaves.

As the orgasms strait, I kiss Doug. His come seconds later.

clock time speeds by, the sun sets, Doug is watching a secret plan after dinner, Leanna is out - I've no melodic theme where she is. I don't remember talking to her.

I write Doug a quick promissory note. I tell him Leanna is having car fuss, I'm going to pick her up. I leave it adjacent to the table by his reclining chair. I kiss his forehead and leave.

*

This whip hurts so bad, but feeling so very serious. I left Doug sleeping and went straight to Fat Rob's. I'm being whipped again. I don't remember even asking for it, but these black men are taking turns doing it and fucking me as I hang from my carpus again.

I scream out with pain and pleasure. I don't want them to stop even though I don't understand why they are doing this.

With each whip cleft I think back to my third session with Ulysses.


-5-

I remember I wore something lots nicer and sexier than usual attire for my next appointment with Ulysses. It was a tighter, curt dress, new place. Adjusting my wedding ceremony closed chain, I felt silly, but figured no impairment would come from dressing nicer.

"Ulysses, I want to talk about regrets. Not simply feeling bad that sex is a huge part of your sprightliness, but is there anything you really repent that you struggle to pull in heartsease with ? Perhaps to do that would help you find more fulfillment out of life."

Ulysses was quiet, contemplating what I said, but also searching his thoughts.

"Yeah,"he eventually spoke up.

I waited for him to serve, giving him time.

"I was in Miami. I go down there often for work, shoots and so on. I met a woman at a club. A beautiful brunette named Megan. That happens every time I go to club, but she was dissimilar. She had long, loggerheaded brown haircloth, blue eyes and she was short. She was so commanding, like she was a boss or handler, and knew what she wanted and how to get it."

"She wanted you ?"I asked, knowing the answer, not blaming the woman.

"Yeah."

I leaned forward a bit, hoping he'd glance at my cleavage."So what do you regret ?"

"Megan took me dwelling. We were in her kitchen, living way, everywhere, having sex. We ended up in her bed. That's when I learned she was married,"Ulysses explained.

My middle widened."Married ?"

"Yeah. I should've left. I've been in that situation before, and always felt horrible. I'm not the form of guy that purposelessly goes out and try to ruin marriage, or get white women to rip off, or leave their husbands for me. The few clock time I've slept with a married women - I hate to say this, but it was inadvertent. I wasn't planning on it or searching for it."

My breathing was fickle, my affectionateness pumping,"Um, ok, I see. So you and Megan had sex and there was regret."

"Yes, but I didn't leave, I stayed,"Ulysses sighed. I could tell there was more he wanted to share.

"You were enjoying it."

"Yes, but then she told me to tie her up. Megan wanted me to do it by her articulatio radiocarpea. I chickened out. I got too scared to say no. She was hanging there. That's when she told me to look in her closet. She told me to land out a lash she was hiding there."

"A whip ?"

"Yeah. She wanted me to lash her. I thought it was a racial thing. Black slaves were whipped. I asked her and she told me it was only for her. She felt guilt trip about something and wanted it whipped out of her."

"cheat ?"

"She didn't say. But I complied, like an changeling. I whipped that poor womanhood over and over just like she asked me to. She cried out from pain sensation, then begged me to keep going. When it was done, I regretted ever meeting her. I regretted enabling her to cheat, regretted whipping her. I regretted the whole night."

I took a thick breathing time and scribbled in my notes."Ever see her again ?"

"No. We had sex one more meter in the cascade, then I left."

I was unable to focus for the relaxation of his academic term. Part of me was so turned on not just from Ulysses, but sleeping with him, the approximation of an social function with him, maybe even being whipped.

That night I took a long bathroom. I set my marriage ceremony ring on the side of the tub and fingered myself to climax several times - thinking of Ulysses.

*

That's where and when I first heard about a whip.

Doug is behind me now ; I'm on all fours. I can't conceive he doesn't notice the party whip score from Fat Rob. Doug has said nothing. Leanna has said nothing. I don't remember what prison term I got home. No one noticed or said anything about her conjecture car trouble.

I feel regret and disgrace for what I'm doing. I don't know when or how this will end.

I feel nothing as Doug fucks me from behind. I'm looking out into the backyard, it's pouring down rain. I didn't even notice it was cloudy.


-6-

I remember now. It was raining when I first met Ulysses, it was raining during his twenty-five percent session - the 1st time we had sex.

things seem absolved now, but I still can't piece it all together. Doug is on top of me now. I don't feeling him. It's like my senses aren't working. But I remember Ulysses.

He showed up to his fourth session. I was wearing another sexy dress. I fingered myself all week thinking of him. I practically jumped on him.

He was startled, not expecting it. But I knew deep down he knew it would find - with a inglorious body, face, stopcock like his, sex with every white woman he encounters was the normal.

Ulysses tried to resist at first. I was straddling him, kissing him on the couch. He pointed to my wedding ring in between kisses. I shut him up with my mouthpiece over his. We were naked soon. He slammed me on my desk and took me there.

I came so hard, so fast, so powerfully from him pistoning in and out of me. The downpour of rainfall outside hopefully muffled my groan of pleasure a bit.

We went quickly, 45 minutes into it and he came inside me. He apologized, gathered his clothes and left.

My kitty-cat was oozing come onto my desk. After a few minutes, I went to my knees and licked it from my desk. I put my clothes on, sat in my chair and waited for my succeeding appointment, pushing aside what I just did.

I cried myself to catch some Z's that Night, my left pollex rubbing my nuptials ring.

Ulysses and I met only two more sessions. Each one was nothing but sex. We did it on my desk, on the couch, I swallowed his semen each time.

On the final seance, Ulysses told me he was drear, but couldn't see me anymore. He said he's accepted this is how his biography is and will shape harder to be nigh with Devin. That was it. I watched him put his clothes back on and leave.

Leanna caught me crying that nighttime at the house. She tried consoling me, but I brushed her off. I saw the aspect of headache on her face, but I had to dole out with what I've done on my own.

*

I remember everything now. I remember how I got here.

It was New Year's Eve. Leanna told me to remove my wedding pack, she was taking me out. I resisted at first, but I know why she asked me to remove it.

We were at a club, I saw several men approach her, some of them she pointed to me. One man, she introduced me to. His name was Fat Rob. He's why I'm here, he's why I'm in this place. He's why retentivity were hazy. He's why everything seems odd.

I'm having sex with Fat Rob right now. I'm on my bed, Doug is somewhere, I don't remember where. I'm riding Fat Rob so hard, I feel like the bed will break.

I kiss him arduous, he calls me"young lady Brandi"again. I resume grinding into him.

I hear Doug approach. His stride are so gimcrack, like thunder. I can't plosive consonant riding Fat Rob though.

"Brandi ?"he calls out."You there ?"his voice his booming.

I grit my teeth and keep fucking this blackness man."Yes ! Yes ! roll in the hay yes !"

The bed collapses and I keep going, keep cumming. Each one of Doug's footfall thunder through the hallway.

It's raining again, I can hear it outside, over the sound of my primal oink or orgasms.

He's taking forever to reach our bedchamber and capture me in the act. Why is he moving so slow ?

Sir Thomas More thundering footsteps, my public figure being called. Fat Rob smack my ass, I know Doug hears it.

"Brandi !"he yells, upon entering our elbow room. I don't full point having sex with Fat Rob. I look over my shoulder joint and see Doug's dismay face. He falls to his human knee's crying.

Leanna enters the room, naked, pushing Doug over– he can't stop crying.

"Mom !"Leanna says. I am paralyzed, ineffectual to look away from my crying hubby. He slams his fist into the floor, a audio of thunder Echo in the room.

"Mom !"Leanna shakes me, but all I see is Doug crying, striking the floor in agony. The room dims, getting darker and darker. Did we lose power from the storm ?

Doug is changing, he's turning brighter. He's a illumine source, bright, shinning in my eye. I remember Fat Rob, what I've done, how I got here.

"Doug !"I cry."Doug ! I scream his name over and over again."Doug, please !"the bright visible radiation is blinding now. I can't breathe.


-7-

"Doug ! Doug !"I woke up in a hospital bed.

Leanna was right there next to me,"Mom !"

"Where am I ? Where's Doug ?"

"What ?"Leanna glanced to the nurse.

She started crying and the nurse excused herself. I was gasping for air, called out Doug's gens over and over.

"Mom,"Leanna shook her head.

"What am I doing here ? I want to see Doug."

"Mom, no, he's -"

It felt like my heart was going to burst. I was out of breath. I gripped Leanna's hand as voiceless as I could.

"Doug,"I whispered, hoping to calm myself down.

"He's gone, Mom. Remember ? It's been over a year,"Leanna said.

"What ? A year ? Where ?"I was crying now.

"Mom, remember, that's why we moved here. So he could be closer to his family before he -"Leanna wiped a snag."Before he passed away."

I closed my eyes. I heard the rain outside my hospital windowpane. A loud pop of roaring snapped my eyes open.

"Over a year,"I repeated. Leanna nodded. I remembered now.

"What happened stopping point night ?"I asked, looking around the hospital elbow room, releasing my adhesive friction on Leanna's hand.

"New Year's Eve. I took you to a club. I thought it'd be fun. The two of us hanging out,"Leanna answered.

"My ring ?"I glanced to my left wing hand, not seeing it there.

"It's at home. Right by the bed."

"Did you -"
"Yes, mom. I thought if you could carry it off maybe you'd meet person and, well, have fun. You haven't taken it off since Doug's funeral. I just thought,"Leanna said.

I sat up in bed, hugging her, knowing she was trying to help.

"I'm sorry, I'm so dreary,"Leanna's crying returned.

"For what, sweetie ?"

"I took you to that club. I introduced you to someone I thought was a friend. That piece of snitch - I mean, Fat Rob. I saw him put something in your beverage. I nearly punched him out. I grabbed you and took you home."

"Leanna,"I cried.

"Mom, you wouldn't wake up. He must've put too practically of whatever it was. I called 911, I was freaking out. I didn't want to lose you too,"Leanna said.

"The ambulance rushed you here, they pumped your stomach. But you still didn't wake up. You've been here asleep for almost two days."

"Fat Rob. I didn't go, I mean, he and I didn't,"I was putting the piece of music together.

"No. I'm so glad I saw him slip something into your drink. If I hadn't been paying attending -"

"Oh, sweetheart, come here,"I hugged her again.

I held her for respective minutes as she cried."I'm active, I'm awake, I'm fine."

I took a deep intimation, abbreviated double of the incubus I had flashed before my eyes. The whipping, the duskiness, the chains, the melanize man in the exhibitor, Fat Rob, and finally my late-husband witnessing a fearful event - one that thankfully, wasn't real.

I shook the double from my head teacher and held my daughter. She was still wearing the dress she wore on our night out.

*

I went home the next day. I had trouble walking a bit, and my head hurt, but I was fine. Thankfully, whatever Fat Rob slipped into my deglutition wasn't plenty to kill me.

I considered filing a law write up. But neither Leanna nor I know his last epithet, where he works, or anything other than his appearance. Still, it wouldn't distress to do it.

I looked in on the bed I destroyed in my nightmare. It was entire, undisturbed, just like it was the after Doug's funeral over a year ago. Leanna keeps the room clean, she dusts it and so on.

I moved into the client elbow room after Doug died. I couldn't be in our way, it hurt too often to not have him there.

I sat on the bound of the client bed, running my hands through my hair when something caught my eye - my wedding ring on the bedside table.

I stared at it for several seconds before slowly reaching for it. I started to put it on, but stopped myself."No,"I said out loud. I opened the drawer and stowed it safely away.

The following workweek, Leanna and I went through Doug's habiliment and other items, boxing them up, taking them to Goodwill.

We painted the bulwark a unlike color. There was no double-door to the back porch in that room, unlike in my nightmare, there was a large window though. We got new shades for it. I moved all furniture out and bust up the carpet.

A hebdomad later, wood floor was in post, and the room looked totally different.

One item remained - a bed. The survey weekend, Leanna helped me break up out a new bed for that room - my way. I moved out of the Guest room that night.

Leanna slept in there with me on my initiative night back in that room since Doug passed away.

Another couple of week passed. I was at my bureau. My 10am naming cancelled. I decided to spend a penny a earpiece call.


-8-
"Brandi, hey, how are you ?"Ulysses answered my call. It'd been various weeks since I last saw him.

"I'm doing well. What about you ?"

"I'm fine,"he answered. I could narrate he felt awkward.

"Listen, I was thinking if you don't have plan, we could fill for lunch today. There's something I'd like to tell you. More of an apology, actually."

"Yeah, that's cool. We can fit up,"he said.

"Great. My treat."

We met a match hour later at a nearby restaurant. I didn't dissipation any time ; immediately telling him I was sorry for my unprofessionalism. He was accepting, nodding and smiling politely.

"There's more,"I glanced to my left paw, my wedding ring no longer there.

"I feel the mop up about not being up front with you. I have trouble saying these language, what about I'm about to distinguish you,"I glanced at my helping hand once more, then back to his eyes.

"I'm not married. I wasn't married when we had sex. My husbanded died over a class ago. I haven't been able to submit the ring off, until recently. I'm so sorry, I should've told you, I shouldn't have lunged at you like that during that session. But I couldn't say the dustup, I couldn't let go. I guess I never will, Doug will always be in my core in some way, but I want you to know I'm sorry for any regret or guilt you felt by thinking you had sex with another wed woman."

Ulysses was quiet, eyes blanket, taking my words in."Brandi, I, um, thanks. I did feel bad. I thought you were married, that's why I stopped using you as a therapist. But thank you for telling me. I've never lost a better half, but I imagine it's intemperately to say that they're gone, that you're not married anymore and to strike off the ring."

"Yes,"I smiled at him.

"Are you doing ok ? I mean, are you feeling better about not wearing it ?"

"Yes, it was time. My daughter took me out on New Year's. She tried to aid me proceed on. I guess in some ways it worked."

We smiled at each other once more before our meal arrived. I learned Sir Thomas More of Ulysses that day. I learned he actually took my advice. He and his former stepmother are thinking about moving in with one another and maintaining an open, but not too open air, relationship.

He and I met up after I left the billet for the day.

Ulysses stood at the invertebrate foot of his bed. I was on my knees, kissing over his venter, second joint and beautiful shaft. I sucked it lovingly, slowly, smiling at up at him.

I stood and he squatted, picking me up, my wooden leg wrapping around his waistline. Standing there, he guided his stopcock in me. I almost climaxed when he entered me. We kissed and he moved me to the bed.

Laying me gently on my back, he kissed me again. Propping himself up with his paw, I placed my own hands on his breast, as he slowly began sliding his cock in and out of me.

I orgasmed minutes later, he rolled onto his back, taking me with him. Kissing him again, I slowly hinge upon him, savoring his farseeing shaft hitting all the right floater inside me.

We went until after midnight. I kissed him goodbye, told him I'd see him again sometime. He said that'd be great, he suggested I meet Devin. At the time I was ok if I never saw him again. However, I know that I feel much ameliorate now.

I did see him again. I'm lying in his arms right now. It's been a few months since my Nox out with Leanna on New twelvemonth's, getting drugged, and waking up in the hospital a yoke solar day later. It was a horrible event.

The nightmare I had is a trivial fuzzy, some of the inside information lost over sentence. But I'll never forget it. Luckily, I've slept much better. Every once in a while a human teddy bear, named Leanna, will join me, snuggling up to me, watching a movie in my new bed. I'm thankful I have her support.

I'm thankful for Ulysses too. I kiss his chest of drawers and roll back on top of him, sliding his cock back inside me. We meet up occasionally for luncheon or dinner - then sex. He's not my boyfriend, just a outstanding friend.

The other week I met Devin. She's in the shower now. After I cum on Ulysses in a yoke moment, we'll probably join her.

I'm intellection of moving back to capital of West Virginia. Leanna and I weren't as nigh to Doug's crime syndicate. Since he's gone now, maybe it's time I return home.

This intense coming passes, Ulysses holding me. We kiss, he sits up, his prick still embedded inside me and takes me the shower to join Devin.

Ulysses sets me down in the shower. Devin hugs and kiss me on the cheek. I smile at her and we both go to our knees to overhaul Ulysses'long, morose rod.
I pop his cockhead out of my oral cavity. I look to him, seeing him grinning at me. I'm gladiolus I was able to help him a fiddling during those few weeks I was his therapist.

He and my daughter don't yet recognise how much they have helped me.

The end .